“Guns Everywhere” Law Takes Effect Today in Georgia

Guns Everywhere LawStartin’ tidday, Cooter, y’all kin carry yore loaded fahrarms inta yer fav’rit bar — heck, inta annybuddy’s bar an’ even them fancy nightcluhbs. Ain’tit GREAHT? Now when y’all are in thar a-fixin’ ta git ahl sloshiefaced, nobiddy’s a-gonna mess with yew, ‘cuz yew is a-packin’, and a-holsterin’, and a-strappin’ crosst boaf fruhnt AN’ back!

An’ yew don’t hafta leave nuffin’ in th’ gun rack in yer back winder when y’all go in th’ libarry ta look at the pitchers in the’ latest “Guns ‘n Ammo,” ‘cuz yew can carry in thar now, tew!

‘Member how nekkid evvahbuddy wuz feelin’ in church, wearing jez them slacks an’ shooz an’ a buttonup shart an’ TAAH? Not this Sundee! Ya’ll kin carry in thar’, in casin’ yer kin gets all rascally an’ needs ta be put down afore sewshull haur.

Oh, an when yew pick up them keeds tidday at th’ skoooolhaus, yew can pack when yew go in thar fer thet confrance wit thet teechur what keeps complainin’ ’bout lil’ Buford not payin’ no ‘tenshun in skoool. See if’n yew hyear any mohre from thet skoool NAOW, huh!

larry-wines-informalAIN’T IT ALLLL JES’ SO WUN-NER-FULLLLL?!

Ahm gon’ celebrate by buyin’ me some new shoulder streps and long magazine clips! Wan’ git tagathar tanight fer a big reloadin’ party? Letz meet in th’ bar for attitude a-juz-mint then drahve over ta the libarry ’cause they have clean rezrums, an’ thar lawn’s bieg ’nuff fer settin’ up targets. ‘An the skoolz closed-up by thin so if’n we miss we won’t hit nobuddy. Leastin’ nobuddy we know, huh!

Larry Wine

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Comments

  1. Ryder says

    Ridicule in private settings… perhaps that is excusable. But negative and bigoted stereotypes are supposed to be what LAP is against. How does such drivel get published?

    I suppose it is instructive… most of the time it’s not published… but sadly, the progressive is still very much bigoted and advances stereotypes as much (or more) than anyone else does.

    The last time people ridiculed Georgia about guns… there was a surprising result:

    30 years ago, Kennesaw, GA passed a town ordinance REQUIRING residents to own and keep a gun and ammunition (as part of a citizen’s duty to be prepared to defend their property, thus relieving the implied requirement that others do it for them).

    Why did they do this? They did it, because the town of Morton Grove Illinois had passed a gun *ban*, and the town of Kennesaw wanted to set the opposite example.

    The predictions were widespread mayhem for Kennesaw… and peace and tranquility in Morton Grove.

    The precise opposite occurred.

    Murder free and with a lowered crime rate, Kennesaw shines. Guns have a way of making people more polite, I guess. Even with a population on the rise.

    Morton Grove, with it’s gun ban, saw instant increases in violence, including gun violence… even though its population decreased.

    If we believe that people with guns that we call “police”, make for a safer, more tranquil life, then it should be no surprise that people with guns that we call “the public”, do the exact same thing.

    When Morton Grove disarmed it’s law abiding citizens… they turned them into ready victims, and they were pounced upon and savaged by the filth of humanity… those that ignore the rights of others.

  2. R Zwarich says

    This kind of elitist characterization of the nation’s folk, its most uneducated and least informed citizenry, may be entertaining to some, but it is really not useful to any constructive purpose. I wonder if Mr. Wine got a hoot and a kick out of the Joad’s unsophisticated back-country language and manner when he read ‘Grapes of Wrath’. C’mon folks, we can surely do better than this.

    RZ

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *