Dan Embree: What I need O Lord is a little light and guidance on the 25th Amendment as respects the removal of President Trump from office
Dan Embree: In any case, you pretended that no one had seen what everyone had seen. I guess that’s your major strength – your ability to make up and impose on others an obviously false reality. Melania pretends to think you’re faithful. Kelly pretends to think you’re smart. Your “base” pretends to think you’re one of them.
Dan Embree: “Listen, I’m just the eyes and ears of the White House at DOJ. Donald Trump is . . . you know . . . the sort of . . . you might say . . . brains. I barely know him, by the way.”
Dan Embree: Achilles has a foot problem – not like yours, of course, because it didn’t keep him out of combat – but you can tell that he was always worried about his weak heel betraying him.
Dan Embree: Like millions of other Americans, my wife and I signed up to join a demonstration this week to protest your appointment of an obscure lawyer (whose chief qualification seems to be loyalty to you) as Acting Attorney General.
Dan Embree: Kellyanne was more fun than Reince and not nearly as creepy as Steven and so obviously for hire that we didn’t take her seriously.
Dan Embree: Pressed on how the hacking of the DNC could be linked to that of Khashoggi, Pompeo confided, “Listen, we’re thinking outside the bounds of logic here.”
Dan Embree: I tried to slip by inconspicuously, but because they were blocking my way, I accidently brushed the palm of my hand across the bottom of the lumpy Jewish-looking one.
Dan Embree: “Dear Agatha: Can you describe this game, Devil’s Triangle, that Brett played with his buddies? We play games at 4-H and would like to try it. We can’t drink yet. Can we play it with Coke? ”
Dan Embree: Kellyanne Conway warned against any “fishing expedition” that would expose crimes not already known. “That would be unfair to any nominee who has so far covered up a violent past.”
Dan Embree: Slowly word spread through town. Girlfriends and wives smiled and shook their heads. Men asked one another how they were doing. “Harder and harder,” was the grim reply. More signatures.
Dan Embree: Now that Manafort has flipped, I’ll pardon him and the rest of them and destroy the whole Witch Hunt in one stroke. Then I’ll order Maria Butina freed from federal custody and fly to Moscow with her on Air Force One.
Dan Embree: Rudy has told everyone to ignore it – like when Trump says that 18 Puerto Ricans died from Hurricane Maria despite being (who knew?) on an island.