LA Progressive

Smart Content for Smart People

  • Home
  • About Us
    • About Us / Copyright Info
    • Privacy Policy
  • Topics
    • Animal Rights
    • Climate Change
    • Economic Justice
    • Education Reform
    • Elections and Campaigns
    • Environment
    • Community Calendar
    • Healthcare Reform
    • Immigration Reform
    • Labor
    • Law and Justice
    • LGBTQ
    • Progressive Issues
    • Social Justice / Racism
    • The Media
    • The Middle East
    • War and Peace
  • Authors
    • All Authors
    • Steve Hochstadt
    • Charles D. Hayes
    • David A. Love
    • Diane Lefer
    • Dick Price
    • Jerry Drucker
    • John Peeler
    • Joseph Palermo
    • Tom Hall
    • Sharon Kyle
    • Sikivu Hutchinson
  • Events
    • Left Coast Forum
    • Event Calendar
  • Subscribe
  • Contact Us

Is It the Apocalypse or Just the End of Western Civilization?

hotdogsThis just in: All Americans are athletes! The Hot Dog Eating contest* was broadcast last Sunday on ESPN, and got some play in all the major newspapers. The San Francisco Chronicle even noted the broadcast of the contest in their daily sports TV log under the title of “Eating.” It was right there with “Cycling”, “Soccer” and the other so-called sports. I forgot to set the DVR.

Though it was touted as a “sporting event”, the SF Chronicle gave me confusion and dissonance by placing the final story of the event on page A-4 rather than in the Sports or Food Section. As a measure of the importance, It took up about a third of the page.

Finally, gustatory athletes are getting the respect and standing they so richly deserve. Eating IS a sport – fork, spoon, chopsticks, we have various categories for competition. Then of course there is the “finger food” category, which includes hot dogs.

The controversy surrounding the aftermath was made for the Maury Povich Show. It was reported that the defending champion** “crashed” the event afterward because he refused to sign a contract with “Major League Eating (MLE).” I also learned from the Chronicle that (MLE) is the fast-food equivalent to the National Football League (NFL), our national sport.

I suppose the point of all this is that stuffing as many hot dogs into one’s mouth as possible in 10 minutes is good, clean, healthy fun, and that all young Americans should aspire to such ambitions. If you get really good at it, you can turn pro and sign endorsement contracts. After all, eaters are athletes. That means that roughly 99.9999% of Americans are considered athletes. Now our perception is changing. Obesity and digestive nightmares are merely part of the game, like a sprained ankle from a basketball game. Oh, those heroic war wounds.

Name me one other sporting event where the traditional celebration involves hoisting a bottle of Pepto-Bismal. I thought the milk thing at the Indy 500 was creepy, but Pepto-Bismal? Sounds like a gag on the old “Rowan & Martin’s Laugh-In.” I’m left wondering why is it taking the SF Chronicle so long to hire a full-time “Eating” reporter? Maybe it’s because their sports section has a conflict of interest with their food editors. Now, I understand why this ended up in the front section rather than the Sports or Food Section; it was a compromise so the department editors would stop fighting over it.

Big event, big news and just the right amount of information. Not too much; not too little, but JUST right. I feel full.

*I refuse to ID or dignify the corporate sponsor.

**I refuse to ID or dignify him either.

H. Scott Prosterman

Scott Prostermanis a music, film and dance historian in Berkeley. He worked as a disc jockey in Pittsburgh and Memphis, where he grew up and where it all began. He was born in the 50s, grew up in the 60s, thrived in the 70s, barely survived the 80s, and re-grouped in the 90s.

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

By H. Scott Prosterman posted on July 9, 2010

DISCLAIMER: The opinions expressed here are those of the individual contributor(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the LA Progressive, its publisher, editor or any of its other contributors.

About H. Scott Prosterman

H. Scott Prosterman is a writer, humoristm and editor living in Berkeley, California. He was born in the '50s, came of age in the '60s, thrived in the '70's, barely survived the '80's and regrouped in the '90's." He holds a B.A. w/Honors from Rhodes College; an M.A. from The University of Michigan.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Thank You For Supporting Independent Media. The LA Progressive cannot publish without your support. Please donate. Thanks....

This Weeks Featured Posts

The Afghanistan Pentagon Papers

The Afghanistan Pentagon Papers

trump impeachment

Articles of Impeachment: Impeaching Donald John Trump

Bernie Consistency

Warren vs. Buttigieg Clash Offers Contrast with Bernie’s Consistency

Nationalize Facebook

Is It Time to Regulate or Nationalize Facebook?

New York Nurses Strike

A Boss is a Boss: Nurses Battle for Their First Union Contract at Albany Medical Center





Impeachment TrapIranian American RelationsKerry Endorses BidenHolding Trump AccountableMatt Bevin DepartsDan BrotmanTrump the Anti-ConservativeMoral InjuryUnited World



Sponsored

Principles of Law

The Principles of Law that Americans Should Understand

Best Wedding Photographer Surrey

The Best Wedding Photographer Surrey

More Posts from Sponsored

Book-A-Bus



Article Categories

Africa | Animal Rights | California
Climate Change | Defense | Economic Justice
Education Reform | Elections | Environment
Events | Foreign Policy | Gay Rights
Healthcare Reform | Immigration Reform
Juvenile Justice | Labor | Latin America
Law and Justice | Los Angeles | Prison Reform
Progressive Issues | Science & Religion
Sexism | Social Justice | Terminal Velocity | The Body Politic
| The Media | The Middle East | Veterans
War and Peace | Wellness

Los Angeles

Organizing in South LA

Rethinking 27 Years of Organizing in South LA

Elect Loraine Lundquist

Let’s Elect Loraine Lundquist, a Breath of Fresh Air for City Council 

More Posts from Los Angeles

The Middle East

If Americans Knew

The Most Enduring Media Cover Up

Trump and Netanyahu

Trump and Netanyahu: How the Far Right Subverts Democracy Globally

More Posts from The Middle East

Economic Issues

Race to the Bottom

“Booming” Economy Means More Bad Jobs and Faster Race to the Bottom

billionaires and capitalism

Why Billionaires Don’t Really Like Capitalism

More Posts from Economic Justice

Copyright © 2019 · Dick Price and Sharon Kyle · Log in