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kellyanne conway

Tuesday, 17 October 2017

Dear Mr President,

I know I’ve praised Kellyanne Conway to you before on account of her mindless loyalty to you in the face of factual evidence that would daunt a carnival barker. But last week she didn’t do you any favors. A smart reaction to the revelations about Harvey Weinstein’s successful decades-long repurposing of his film production company into a system for delivering aspiring starlets to his shower stall would have been to announce a tour of disaster sites (God knows you’ve got them) to hand out generators and water-purification kits in Puerto Rico or bullet-proof vests in Las Vegas.

Kellyanne Conway couldn’t pull herself out of campaign-rally mode, couldn’t see the Weinstein scandal as anything but another vehicle for attacking the Clintons.

But Conway couldn’t pull herself out of campaign-rally mode, couldn’t see the Weinstein scandal as anything but another vehicle for attacking the Clintons. Thus she emphasized the theme of powerful old men exploiting their influence to prey upon young women and using their money to buy the women off afterwards. Whom does this remind you of?

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Worse, the coverage of the Weinstein case has called attention to the institutional structure (with all its assistants and associates and secretaries and lawyers) that was marshaled in service to the boss’s penis – a well-paid, expensively dressed, high-rise, air-conditioned, tastefully appointed institutional pimp. How can that not remind everyone in America of the Miss Teen America Beauty Pageant with its conveniently unlocked dressing room full of naked girls or of the “reality” show whose contestants, as your Wikipedia blurb quotes you as claiming, all “flirted” with you?

And now, right on cue, comes the subpoena from one of your accusers, Summer Zervos, alleging sexual misconduct when she was one of your “Appentices”. Her lawyer, Gloria Allred, obviously supposes an institutional support group behind the alleged fondling (or groping or grabbing – your preferred term – or whatever) because her subpoena targets “directors, officers, partners, shareholders, managers, attorneys, employees, agents and representatives” of your campaign organization and your business enterprises.

And you may have noticed that Conway and her trademark clown-smile have become features on Saturday Night Live – not, as in former days, in a supporting role, but in her own right, without you as the caricature of real importance. It may be time to send her off to some foreign land like Puerto Rico to pass out toilet paper to the natives.

dan-embree-17

Dan Embree

Received by the White House at 6:09 EST, 17 October 2017