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Donald Trump, or as I call him, BLOTUS TRUMPUTIN, has been a Democrat most of his life, growing up in Queens and then residing in Manhattan. Have any Democratic ideals rubbed off on him in the process, or is he just an empty vessel whose beliefs and moral fiber depend on whom he is talking to at the moment, and what can benefit him personally the most?

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Does Hope Lurk Inside the Mind of Donald Trump?—Ted Vaill

In the past, Trumputin has criticized President George W. Bush for starting the Iraq War, said he will preserve and protect (and even expand) Social Security and Medicare, favors the right to choose, and even wants to eliminate the "carried interest" loophole and in this way tax more people like him (but not exactly him, as he apparently pays no taxes).

BLOTUS (shorthand for Biggest Liar of the United States) has said that on his first day in office he will take steps to withdraw from the Iran nuclear deal. However, since Putin has him by the short hairs, I predict he will crump on this campaign promise and stand by it, which is the right thing to do. In his case, however, he will do this because Iran is an ally of Russia, and Putin supports the Iran deal.

Regarding immigration, Trumputin will receive serious pushback from American businesses dependent on immigrant labor for jobs most native Americans will not do. If his INS operatives sweep the grape fields of California to round up undocumented grape pickers, the grapes will rot on the vines. Likewise, who will wash the dishes in the Trump hotel restaurants? President Obama has deported 1.8 million people to Mexico over his eight years, many of them with criminal records, far more than any other President. What will Trumputin do to top this?

Building a wall along the Mexican border may be a great campaign slogan, but it will be grossly impractical: 40% of the border land on the U.S. side is in private hands, and only the lawyers will get rich from defending the eminent domain lawsuits which will go on for year and years. There is also a treaty with Mexico which prevents either country from doing anything to impede the flow of the Rio Grande River which traverses the entire border between Texas and Mexico. Border war anyone?

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BLOTUS wants to make sure every American has health insurance, so he could just embrace a new idea, one he is now eligible for at the advanced age of 70: MEDICARE FOR ALL.

BLOTUS wants to invest $10 trillion to improve America's infrastructure, creating JOBS! JOBS! JOBS!, but how will this be paid for? The Democrats in Congress have been calling for infrastructure investment for years, but the Tea Party Scrooges in Congress will not do something that is not paid for, and they will not raise taxes to pay for it. So a coalition of Democrats in Congress and moderate Republicans (there must be a few of them left) will have to join to pass an infrastructure bill.

Trumputin's foreign policy adventures over the next few years should be entertaining, to say the least. Scrub the Russian sanctions? Done. Anger China by inviting the President of Taiwan to visit the White House? Will happen soon. Threaten Kim Il Un with nuclear obliteration if he aims an intercontinental missile at the U.S. homeland? Count on it. Personally waterboard a Muslim suspected terrorist on live Pay TV? Perhaps this might be going too far, although the Trumpsters would love it, and it would raise some campaign money.

Here's an idea…BLOTUS wants to make sure every American has health insurance, so he could just embrace a new idea, one he is now eligible for at the advanced age of 70: MEDICARE FOR ALL. Hire your old Brooklyn neighbor Bernie Sanders to do it for you - I am sure he could get many of his fellow Democrats in Congress (at least those not in bed with Big Pharma and the health insurance companies) to go along, as well as some Republican Members of Congress not running for reelection.

Rather than "draining the swamp", Trumputin seems to be jumping into the swamp and having a mud bath. Why not just nationalize "Goldmine Sucks" (as I call it), and make them the Treasury Department. They probably could run it better than George Bush's people did. But don't invite Bob Rubin back…

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And when will the naked coed swimming parties in the White House pool begin?

Ted Vaill