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Dear Mr. President: God Knows Where This Will End

trumps russia connection

Friday, 3 November 2017

Dear Mr President,

Like a lot of Americans, I’m struggling to keep the story straight, so I’ve worked out the following Dramatis Personae. Let me know if I’ve got it right:

George Papadopoulos – “a young low-level volunteer . . . who very few people knew”, though one of the very few was you, who said he was a foreign-policy advisor and “an excellent guy”. The Russians picked him out as dumb enough (like they did later with Junior) to suck him into a meeting with…

a woman introduced as Vladimir Puten’s niece (who wasn’t really Vladimir Puten’s niece) who said she could arrange a meeting between Puten. and you, so then he (Papadopoulos) reported this to…

Junior, the marginally smarter of your two older sons, was also picked out as a likely pigeon and so went to a meeting to discuss adoption with…a bunch of guys with hard-to-pronounce names – who knows who they were – and with…Jared Kushner…

Sam Clovis, a talk-show host who was your National Co-chair of your campaign, and so probably known to you, especially as you later nominated him to the top scientist position in the USDA though he isn’t a scientist, who said when told about the proposed meeting, “Great job”, and then took him (Papadopoulos) to a meeting of campaign big-wigs where Papadopoulos proposed the Puten thing at a table with…

you, who said nothing, at one end and…

Jeff Sessions at the other, who, in a rare flash of legal clarity, rejected it, but…

somebody suggested that another low-level dumb guy…

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maybe Carter Page, go to Russia to have a meeting about something, which he (Page) did but doesn’t think he met with any Russian agents there (except his cab drivers, waiters, hotel maids, and some guy who whispered “Ze wind iss in ze rigging” to him on the Metro one day and then disappeared), and meanwhile…

Junior, the marginally smarter of your two older sons, was also picked out as a likely pigeon and so went to a meeting to discuss adoption with…

a bunch of guys with hard-to-pronounce names – who knows who they were – and with…

Jared Kushner, your son-in-law, who used to be an important WH advisor trying to solve Mexico, China, and the Middle East but seems to have disappeared to solve some personal (possibly legal) problems, and with…

Paul Manafort, another volunteer who held a minor position in your campaign for a short time – nobody remembers him except…

Robert Mueller, a guy who has held various jobs in the Justice Department and couldn’t seem to keep any of them (and the one he has now seems tenuous), who seems to know everything about everybody, including…

Michael Flynn, Michael Cohen, Roger Stone, and Ivanka, and…

dan-embree-17

God knows where this will end.

Dan Embree

Received by the White House at 12:01 AM EST, 3 November 2017