Satire

Kary Love: Today many are anti-science, a “lifestyle” choice made possible because it is backstopped by science. If your prayers and hopes don’t cure you, you can always go the hospital.

John Peeler: Acknowledging the widely suspected Intelligence Deficit in Washington, particularly in the White House, Trump tweeted, “I will be the only president in history to have prosthetic brains!!”

Marc Cooper: Meanwhile, a small gang of Mexican migrants entered my house and tore out the wood floors in FOUR rooms that got soaked when a water pipe burst.

Peter Cavanaugh: With 17 separate investigations crashing in on his Lord and Master, it might not be long before Poodle dangles a pardon for the presidency and finds a ready taker when Donald can no longer duck.

John Peeler: They’re all out to get me. Now they’re conspiring with 60 other countries to impose the kilogram and deep-six the pound. It’s the GLOBALIST DEEP STATE!

Liz Estrata: Her explicit descriptions of Trump’s member are in prose. She now needs to share those observations with a graphic artist.

Ted Rall: Democratic leaders are confused. They’ve got the newspapers and NPR and a passel of cable news stations all over their “Trump colluded with Russia” story. Why don’t people care? Christ, even Democratic voters don’t care!

Ralph E. Shaffer: Giving only their first names, and with the camera focused on them from the neck down to protect their privacy, each of the shaken women described, in quavering voices, what Farrow had done to them years ago.

Jaime O’Neill: Lewis Black was freaking out before freaking out became the norm. He's the living embodiment of exasperation, the personification of what a sane person looks like when driven 'round the bend by the madness we all live with.

H. Scott Prosterman: Anyone who has read Faulkner or Tennessee Williams knows that Memphis has ALWAYS been the cultural and spiritual capital of the Magnolia State, so let’s go ahead and make it official.

Walter Brasch: “Have you now or have you ever led anything and did you ever have any opinions?” asked the committee chair, Sen. Porkbelly Pineapple.

Michael Sigman: Nowadays, you can't watch cable news for 10 minutes without hearing a talking head hold forth with a "having said that," a "game changer" a "double down" or a "walk back."

Walter Brasch: It’s Father’s Day, and that means the Great White Republican Hierarchy in Washington smells burnt charcoal and is ready to barbeque some Democrats.

Rev. Square: For readers not already acquainted with them, the Laws of Robotics are a 20th century fabulist's attempt to formulate a logically consistent, morally adequate, and reasonably enduring moral code for imaginary, yet-to-be-inventable robots.

Jerry Drucker: Mitt apparently now wishes to HARVEST THE UNITED STATES, as he would for a food crop. So in the spirit of Romney’s interests in cooked books, here are some recipes:

Rich Broderick: In the wake of megastorm Sandy, Bain Capital, which was co-founded by Mitt Romney and where he served as CEO until he resigned in 1999 but didn't actually resign until 2002 when he really meant it, is planning to make a leveraged buyout of the entire Northeast.

Rick Broderick: In the case of Mitt Romney, we believe that the candidate has gone a bridge too far in appropriating the Bob Dobbs personality and stylistic attributes,